Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Teletubby, Hubby Hubby?

Some members of the Polish government are trying to stop what they consider "homosexual propaganda" on tv & they are concerned about the purple Teletubbie called Tinky Winky.
Seriously? This is what they are spending tax dollars investigating? First of all the character is named Tinky Winky, not Fabulous Frankie. ;) And who cares if it is a gay character, it is 2007, what is the problem? Did these people miss that fact that Bert and Ernie were two "single men/puppets" sharing a bedroom together & wearing matching outfits? Hello? But instead of worrying about if Tinky is gay or not, I am more concerned over the fact that it has no eyebrows & an inverted clothes hanger attached to its head. Also, maybe what they should be worried about are the Bratz dolls that look like $2 hookers on a Friday night.

The night the lights went out in Erinsborough

Next year the BBC will stop airing the popular Aussie soap, Neighbours. Apparently the show was too expensive and the BBC couldn't pay the asking price.
I feel for people in the UK because it has been on air there since 1986! They only showed it here for 3 months before they cancelled it, and, surprise surprise, being the good wanna be Aussie that I am, I had practically moved onto Ramsey Street! However I can't imagine how this show can be expensive to produce. After not having seen it for years, when I just went back to AUS this year, I turned it on & all of the sets were exactly the same as they were in 2001, just the families living in the houses had changed. I can't imagine that the actors are paid that much, but maybe I am wrong? In real life is Toadie living the good life with harbour views? And all of the actors leave anyway. Kylie, Dannii, Holly, Delta, Stephanie, etc. they all wind up in London and release pop songs.

Saturday, May 26, 2007

My new favorite movie

Here is a still of the new Baz Lurhmann movie, Australia, with our Nicole and our Hugh Jackman. Hugh as an Australian cowboy? I am dying. I know they just started filming but I want to buy my movie tickets now! ;)

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Pretty......or Pretty Ugly?

I wonder if there are some people who are just so attractive that they feel the need to "make" themselves ugly so that people will listen to what they are saying instead of concentrating on their looks. See exhibit A above. How can you go from gorgeous Jordan Catalano on My So Called Life, to this scary thing on the right? Sigh.

Determination leads to success!

In India, a man proposed to a woman who rejected him because of his looks. He then sat in front of her house for 2 days & went on a hunger strike. She was so taken by his gesture, that she changed her mind & married him.
Really, that is all it takes to convince someone to marry you? Ok, I have to go now, if anyone is looking for me I will be sitting in front of Jesse Spencer's house.....

Booty Down Under

A new study shows that over 1/3 of Australians think that they are not spending enough time on foreplay & prefer intimacy over sex.
Why can't you just have both? Get the party started with intimacy & foreplay, then do the horizontal hokey pokey!

Tuesday, May 22, 2007


Didn't she just have a baby? Because it looks like she is about to give birth to twins! I think she is going to name them Donna and David.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

WTF of the week in America

My friends that don't live in the US always joke with me about Americans & guns. I have been asked everything from "Do you own a gun?", to "Have you ever been shot at?". I always explain that not all American's own guns, many of us are anti-gun & want tougher gun control laws. Then, I read this article below, & it shoots (no pun intended) my argument to hell.
In Chicago a 10 month old baby boy has received a gun permit. The permit actually has the baby's height (2 feet) & weight (20 pounds) on it. Because there isn't an age restriction for a gun in that state, they had to give it to him. The reason Bubba's dad applied for the permit is because the baby's grandfather bought the baby a 12-gauge shotgun as a present. But they won't actually give Bubba the gun until he is about 14 years old.

Ok -1. It is no surprise to me that someone who would actually call a baby "Bubba" would get it a gun permit. 2-Instead of giving a gun as a gift that you won't be able to use for 13 years, why not get him a savings bond or open up a bank account with the $ you spent on the gun & permit, & let that gain interest for 13 years. 3- WTF is wrong with people?

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Goodbye my Gilmore Girls

I just watched the series finale of GG. I don't know what I am going to do now that I can't escape to Stars Hollow anymore. I have seen every episode from the beginning 7 years ago. I didn't realize how sad the last episode was going to be. I will miss the town, the characters, the witty banter, pop culture references and most of all Lorelai & Rory.

Maxim Top 100 women

Ok I guess Maxim magazine came out with a list of top "100 hottie girls that will never date you" or whatever it is called, & here are two things I found fascinating:
1- the #1 was Lindsay Lohan? Really? I am not a guy, but people really think she is prettier then Jessica Alba or Scarlett Johansson and Angelina Jolie? If it was the "spoiled coke head list" or the people we are tired of reading about every single day list"then maybe I could see her being #1, but other then that, I don't think so.
2-Ashley Olsen made the list.....but MaryKate didn't. WTF? They are identical, how the heck can one be hotter then the other, they look the same!

Hamish and Andy contest

I was just listening to my itunes. I noticed that I have 3.4 days worth of Hamish & Andy podcasts. That means I could literally sit at my desk for the next3.4 days & listen to them. I am obviously not crazy so I won't do that, but I feel like they should do some kind of contest with me, kind of like when David Blaine was in the box in London for a week with no food. But I would have to eat during those 3.4 days. It is too the point where I can't really listen to them on my ipod in public anymore bc I burst out laughing & then I get the strangest looks from people who probably think I am just listening to music. The other day on the treadmill at the gym, I put them on & Hamish said something that was so funny that I laughed out loud & almost tripped. I know the people on either side of me must have thought I was a lunatic.

Monday, May 14, 2007

Fairy bread

I will have to check with my Aussies, but what the heck is "fairy bread"?. Do fairies actually make it? I just read about it somewhere and have no idea what it is. I think it also said that it had 100's of millions on it. (For Americans, 100's of millions are sprinkles, but Aussie's are very literal when they name things, and I love that! Ex- here is a road that is long & runs along the ocean. Guess what they call it? The Great Ocean Road. That just kills me.) I just have this image now of Liv Tyler in her Lord of the Rings outfit making magic fairy bread.


Why would you bring your mom out clubbing with you?
Why would you bring her and the guy you are shagging?
Why are you in a club since you are only 20?
Why do get paid millions for movies that don't make any money?
Why are you famous? I just don't get it.

Whose your daddy day care

Here's Brad taking Maddox to school. I was just thinking how wrapped is Mad's teacher going to be when it is "Take you Dad to school day." "Maddox, what does your daddy do for work?" "Oh he is just the biggest movie star on the planet, who happens to be dating my mom who is the biggest female movie star. Together they are saving the world." I feel that little Jenny's dad, who is a bus driver, is not going to be able to compete.

Rove on Leno

Ok I finally watched Rove on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. He was very funny & charming and it was so odd for me to watch him on an American show. I am a little nervous that women in the U.S. are going to like him now. All I can say is Back off Beyotches! I saw him first! :)

Thursday, May 10, 2007

The winner is.......

ME!!!! I can't believe it. I had been nominated on a website (www.bestaustralianhotels.com) in a blog contest & I won in my category (Most Humorous) & I won in the Most Wanted category which meant getting the most number of votes overall out of all of the categories!. I am completely shocked bc I have never won anything & the fact that I did win this Australian contest has just got me completely wrapped! Thanks so much for everyone who voted, seriously I am really happy about this. I am going to put the photo above on my application when I apply for my visa.
When I was just in Australia, I went into the library to use the internet & they made me join. I kept joking how happy I was to have my first "Official" Australian piece of ID. Well this prize beat the library card!
I can cross the first two things off of my Aussie to do list.

Things I want from Australia now:
-a library card (DONE)
-Win blog contest (DONE)
-An aussie man with a ute
-a dog (preferably a bluey)
-a job in AUS
-a house with a veranda
-to see Kylie and or Robbie in concert
-go on Rove, possibly marry him
-become a regular on the Hamish and Andy show
-meet Bert Newton

Princess Tazzie

How cute is Our Mary's new baby! I am calling her Baby Princess Tazzie. I just want to say that I was in many pubs in Australia & I never met a prince!

Love is in Bloom in the U.K.

Orlando Bloom thinks that women who want to date him are only interested in him for his money& fame. (Umm, well his looks aren't exactly hurting him either) Anyway he has signed up for an online dating site but he is using his friends photo & name so that people don't know that it is really him. Ok so now that this is public pretty much every girl in the U.K. is going to go to this site to chat with every guy on there hoping it is Orlando. But seriously can you imagine, you rock up to a coffee shop to meet your internet date, & it is Orlando Bloom? The look on that girls face would be priceless. Of course with my luck I would get there & it would be Fabio or someone completely ridiculous.

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Let's play a game.....

What is different about Jessica? Is it her hair? No. Her makeup? I don't think so....what could it be? Owwwww. Sorry her boobs just almost poked my eyes out. WTF? Why would she do this, she looked great before but now she is starting to look like Jessica Rabbit Does Sunset Strip.

Sunday, May 06, 2007

Is showering in jail just like showering at the Hilton?

Ok so I have to break my Paris boycott bc this is just too much. She gets sentenced to 45 days for violating her probation, in other words, breaking the law & this is what her mom says, "The judge made up his mind before he even came in today. If it were anyone else, this would've never had happened. And after all the money we spent!" OMG, classic. Ok Mrs. Hilton needs to hear it like it is. ONE- if this were anyone else, they would have been in jail already. TWO-please let the lesson learned be that money cannot always buy everything. THREE-maybe she should have told her daughter to not open her COMPACT & check her makeup as final statements were being made in court.
In the immortal words of the great philosopher Justin Timberlake:
"What goes around, goes around, goes around, Comes all the way back around"

Sylvester Sta"Stoned"

Earlier this year Sly Stallone was caught importing illegal drugs (growth hormones) into Australia. Now he has banned Australia media from attending a press conference to promote Rocky 14, "When Rocky needs Nappies". Amazing how he gets busted for something illegal & holds it against the Australian media instead of holding himself accountable. I feel that I can speak freely for all Australians by saying "Who cares about your movie anyway!"

Thursday, May 03, 2007

WTF of the Week

A man in Washington (he is a judge, no less) has filed a $65 million lawsuit against his dry cleaner over a pair of his pants that they lost which were later found after 1 week. He was mad that the sign on the wall in the dry cleaners said "same day service" but his pants were lost for a week.
Ok, 1st, my dry cleaners took more then a day once to clean a suit of mine. I didn't think to sue them, I just thought I won't go there anymore. 2nd, does this man really think, if these people had $65 million that they would be running a dry cleaning store instead of sitting on the beach drinking pina coladas? WTF is wrong with people in this country?

Roving around the world?

No No No! I love Rove but I don't want him to come to the US. He was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno this week & I really hope he is not testing the waters in the American market. I need him to stay in AUS so that I can watch him live on Sunday nights when I move there!

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Funny joke...and probably true!

An Australian is sitting at a bar in New York City & looks at his watch several times in the space of a few minutes. The woman sitting nearby notices and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No," he replies, "I have this state-of-the-art watch. I was just testing it." The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?" The Aussie explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically." The lady says, "What's it telling you now?" "Well, it says you're not wearing any panties." The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!'' The Aussie smirks, taps his watch and says, "Bloody thing's running about an hour fast, can I buy you a drink?"

The secret is out

Gisele will no longer be working for Victoria's Secret. Apparently they didn't meet her salary demands and they aren't worried bc they have younger and better looking models. I am actually happy we won't be seeing her as much, as I am getting tired of people constantly confusing her & I.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Rude Americans

Nicole Richie was in Australia for the MTV music awards. Apparently there were fans who slept outdoors for 2 days to see her and when she arrived she ignored them. This disturbs me for many reasons. 1-that she actually has fans. 2-that they would actually sleep out 2 nights to see her. 3-that she was rude to them. I just have to say when I was in Australia I was perfectly pleasant to everyone that I met, and I tipped them! ha

Coke Head Inc.

Kate Moss has a new clothing line in the London store Topshop. Here is a pic of her posing in the store window. The sad thing is she is thinner then the mannequins. I guess this line will appeal to those who do "lines". This should be the slogan:
"If you want to look like a coke head, we have the clothes for you!"

Back in the US

Happy to be home safe but not happy to be home. I miss AUS. sigh