Sunday, September 30, 2007

Loving Letterman

I refuse to mention a certain hotel heiress anymore. But this clip of her on Letterman last week is pretty good. Dave grills her and he is very funny.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koH0sDec2-k

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Summer Heights High

I loved "We could be Heroes" so I was very excited to see that you can download episodes on itunes for free of Chris Lilley's new show Summer Heights High. He is so hilarious as Ja'mie, a Sydney school girl, that when he was on Hamish & Andy last week in character, people were phoning in after the interview to complain about the obnoxious girl. They didn't even realize it was Chris.

24....more...DUI's?

Kiefer Sutherland was arrested for the 4th time for drunk driving. This was after leaving a party that was thrown by his network. OMG seriously, they couldn't hire a car? The millions that he makes & that the studio makes from 24 & they couldn't pay for a cab? Give me a break.

What I am loving this week

Hughsey and Kate. I can't get enough of them! They just crack me up. For aussies living abroad, you can download podcasts of their Nova radio show on itunes for free or can listen live on nova100.com.au

Reason #847 to stop smoking

Ok boys, pay attention! Smokers have 41% more of a chance of developing erectile dysfunction then non smokers. Maybe that will help you quit!
(sorry about having two posts in a row about penises, but sometimes a girls got to do what a girls got to do. I am looking out for the ladies too!)

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

At least he had his own personal "lightning rod"

In Croatia, a motorcyclist stopped at the side of the road bc he had to go to the bathroom. While he was peeing, his penis was struck by lighting! The doctors told him that his rubber boots saved him & the lightning went through his penis.
This just goes to show, you should always wear rubbers....
;)

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Just because....


there is nothing cuter then the annual "hot dog" races!

"Our" Kylie is back in action

Kylie's new single called "2 Hearts" will be released on Nov. 12th and the album, apparently called "X" will be coming out on Nov. 26th. Yay!

Advice for the week

This website, http://www.gethuman.com/, gives you the 800 # to almost every company in the US, AND more importantly, it tells you what prompts to press to get through to an actual human person instead of an annoying robot voice that says stupid stuff like "hi, I am Jen & I am here to help you." Bookmark this site, you will thank me later when you are on hold with your bank, phone company, etc.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Bad Ass Barry Manilow

Barry Manilow refused to appear on the talk show The View, bc he disagrees with Elizabeth Hasselback's political views & didn't want to compromise his beliefs. I give him credit for standing up for himself, however he is just not believable as a tough guy. See exhibit A to the right.

Get Buffy back!

Last week at a university in Texas, one of the dorms was invaded by bats. That's right, Bats. Students were using brooms & tennis rackets to try to protect themselves.
WTF? Is this school on top of a hellmouth too?

What would you do for 15 minutes of fame?

Chris Crocker, the kid who got his 15 minutes of fame this week by crying on You Tube bc people were making fun of Britney, may actually have the last laugh. He singed a tv development deal this week. Is that all it takes? Ok I have to run now, I am going to tape myself crying over the way Claire died and maybe I will get a role on Mcleods Daughters....

Do you like Pina Coladas? Getting caught in the rain?

Both parties of a married couple in Bosnia were having an affair. Except they were having it with each other & they didn't know it. They were talking in an online chatroom using false screen names.When the finally arranged to meet each other for a date, they realized that the person they were having an "affair" with was really their own spouse!
In other words, the Pina Colada song came true!

Monday, September 17, 2007

2007 Emmy review- part2


Hayden Panettiere- took the Save the Cheerleader, Save the World thing too seriously, I think she has half of California under that dress. She is adorable but this may not have been the best choice. Christina Aguilera & Tony Bennett-amazing performance. I don't know why Christina can't admit she is preggars. It is hard to tell from this pic but she looks ready to give birth. For a minute I thought Tony Bennett was going to be her OB GYN. Sally Field-Gidget looks amazing. She must be about 800 years old now. I was shocked they censored her speech. Who censors the Flying Nun? She was just saying something about if Mother's ruled the world there would not be any wars & they bleeped her out. Unreal. I found this pic of her as Gidget & to be honest she doesn't look that different now!


2007 Emmy Review - part 1


Ryan Seacrest, not that funny but overall he didn't bother me. America Ferrar-so glad that she won. I just wanted them to play America the Beautiful when she walked up on stage. Heidi Va Va Voom Klum looked amazing. Helen Mirren-forget Stacy's mom, this grandma has is going on. She looked fierce. Katherine Heigl-also looked amazing. But when they mispronounced her name I wanted her to say "It's Heigl bitch!" & then start lip syncing like Britney. Portia & Ellen-I loved Portia's dress (although I am still annoyed that she speaks with an American accent, you are from Geelong Portia, don't forget it. How can you not be proud to be Australian?)

Environmental tip of the week

Stop taking a receipt at the ATM! If everyone in the US did this, it would save a roll of paper more then 2 Billion feet long. That's right, I said Billion. That is enough paper to circle the equator 15 times.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Real life Nip/Tuck

A man who was declared dead in Venezuela, woke up in the middle of his autopsy as the doctors were making an incision on his face. The good news is he is alive & fine. I am sure this will show up on the next season on Nip/Tuck which starts on Oct. 30th. I cannot wait, I love this ridiculous show!

Rock of love

FYI my fave line from last weeks episode was when the crazy girl was wasted & crawling on the bar, Jess says "She looks like a cracked out cat." I died a little. We all love Jess but don't really want her to win only bc she can do better then Bret Michaels & whoever he ends up with won't last bc they are going to want to film Rock of Love 2, "The groupies strike back" or whatever cheesy name they come up with. I am pretty sure they are already up to Flavor of Love 17, "Whose your baby daddy?" Anyway, tomorrow's show is "Brett meets the parents." Can't wait!

Top 10 cities for single women in AUS

Ok ladies. The following is a list, according to the ratio of single men to single women, for AUS single women to head to if you are looking to get that baby bonus money! The first city on the list has a ration of 180 men per 100 women. Ironically, the name of that city, is "Singleton"! Good luck and God speed...
1) Singleton, NSW 2) Burdekin / Ayr, Queensland 3) Mackay, Queensland 4) Griffith, NSW 5) Gladstone, Queensland 6) Wollongong, NSW 7) Lithgow, NSW 8) Bunbury, Western Australia 9) Whyalla, South Australia 10) Ballina, NSW

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

My advice for the day

If for some reason, you happen to have a bottle of red nail polish on the front seat of your car & it happens to be summer & gets really hot, you might want to pick it up instead of leaving it there & just thinking "Oh I will just get it later." Bc it is entirely possible that the heat can cause the glass to break & you will end up with red nail polish all over the fabric in the seat of your car.....TRUST ME.

The Chasers War on Everything

I didn't get a chance to comment on this last week. I think it is so crazy that with all of the security that was at the APEC summit in Sydney, the boys from the Chasers were able to get so close to Pres. Bush. For American's who wouldn't know, it is a show that has 4 guys who go out & perform funny skits or ask ridiculous questions to famous people. It is hard to describe but it is hilarious. Basically they rented a car, & put a Canadian flag on it & made it through 2 security check points. They picked Canada bc they thought no one has issues with Canada. That is funny! I actually love that a lot of the police in Sydney were kind of like "Good on them, they had a laugh!", instead of freaking out as they would have here. You can check out their website below. My fave is when they do the "If life was a musical" act & go into a grocery store or somewhere & break out into song & dance.
http://www.abc.net.au/tv/chaser/war/video/default.htm

Monday, September 10, 2007

The Biggest Loser

I must be a big loser bc I got sucked into the Biggest Loser marathon on the Bravo channel the other day. The new season of the American version starts tomorrow night & Jillian is back. Game on! I can't wait. I was amazed that last year's winner lost over 200 pounds. I can't believe that. It is like he lost the Olsen twins & a Nicole Richie....

MTV's VMA 2007

Ok, I guess I have to go there. For the past few months I have been trying to not write about Brit bc it just isn't funny anymore, it is sad. She had no friends, not family to speak of & obviously no management that she listens to. I think most people were kind of hoping for her to open the MTV awards in a big way. I am sure everyone saw it by now & yes it was a boring train wreck. You could almost see her thinking about the dance moves in her head. I think that she should have practiced instead of partying it up in Vegas the days before the show. But I am getting so annoyed that people are complaining about her body. She had 2 kids & still looks better in a bra & panties then most people. I heard so many guys today say "Oh she put on weight." P-u-l-e-a-s-e, like any of them would have turned her down if she came onto them? haha. Give me a break.

Tearin up her heart


There once was a prince and princess of pop...
How much does Britney wish she could go back in time to this day!

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Random thought of the day

I am embarrassed to admit I wasted 1 hour of my life watching Celebrity Rap Star on MTV. But I noticed it is a recycled version of Celebrity Fit Club on VH1. Da Brat, Warren G, & Countess Vaughn were all on Fit Club. (Ok I told you it was a random thought, not an important one)

I'm too sexy for this plane....to sexy for this airport..

Last month a 23 year old girl tried to fly on Southwest airlines from California to Arizona. Before she got on the plane an airline employee asked the girl to change her clothes bc she thought that her skirt was too short. When the girl said she didn't have clothes to change into they told her to go home & change. She refused & they finally let her on but demanded that she cover her legs with a blanket for the trip. Since when did stewardesses turn into head mistresses? Seriously she did have a short skirt on but they have some nerve. So if someone shows up wearing a shirt "they" think is too low will they make the person put on a turtleneck? Why don't they worry more about getting the planes to their destinations on time & not losing passengers luggage!

Tastes like chicken? No, sorry, tastes like a newspaper

So there is a new tv show, called CANE, coming out this fall. Rolling Stone magazine will feature "lickable" ads for the show. I am not kidding. When you lick the page it will supposedly taste like a mojito. OMG, I have so many issues here.
Who in their right mind would lick a page in a magazine that possibly many people have had their hands on and/or licked already? You know some idiot is going to get pulled over by the police & use this as an excuse, "No officer, I wasn't drinking, I was licking a magazine." Also I am afraid of what is next, ads for adult diapers that you have to rip the page out & pee on it? Ugh.

Oops, check out those nukes

I got in trouble in work once for forgetting to give my boss at the time a phone message. What happened to these people:
Last week a B-52 bomber plane flew over 3 states in the US for a period of over 3 hours.

What is the big deal you ask? It was carrying nuclear war heads & it was a MISTAKE. But no worries, the Defense dept said the public wasn't in danger. Yeah, ok. Until they mistakenly hit the wrong button and Oops, there goes North & South Dakota. WTF?

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Livin la vida Kylie

I just found this clip, obviously a few years old, of Ricky Martin & our Kylie Minogue performing in London together. I love Ricky & Kylie, it was like my worlds collided....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xikD0Td_pSg

Monday, September 03, 2007

Sad about Steve

It's been 1 year that Steve Irwin died. I can't believe it was 1 year already. I am a little disturbed this week Bindi launched a clothing line, is it necessary to have the same week as the anniversary? But all of the money is going to charity so I guess that makes me feel better.

Please McStop it

Kate Walsh from Grey's Anatomy was married this past weekend. I read so many headlines that said things like, "Kate is McMarried, Walsh is McHitched, They had a McWedding." etc. Get over it people! I don't care about McDreamy, McSinny, McUgly or whoever else is on that McShow. I just know the next thing is one of them is going to have a baby & we are going to read "McWalsh had McSex & had a McBaby." Please from now on only use Mc if it is in front of Donalds. McThanks.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

The "Real" World Sydney

I used to love MTV's The Real World (7 strangers picked to live in a house...etc) but I can't watch it anymore, I am just too old & tired of watching the same types of people (an ignorant person, a hot jock guy, a slutty girl, etc.) have the same fights over & over. BUT this season was in Sydney, I am forcing myself & pretty sure that I am losing brain cells each time I watch an episode. I was just looking forward to getting to see AUS on tv here in America, but so far all they have shown is the obligatory shots of the harbour & Opera House. (I apologize in advance to the people in Sydney who will probably be offended by the stupid comments they are sure to make) For ex. 1 of the guys said something like "There are no good looking girls in AUS. " I was like WTF? You have got to be kidding me. The 1 thing I don't like about AUS is there are 2 many pretty girls there, it is too much competition for cute aussie boys! ;)